Wednesday, February 24, 2010

What is a girl to do??

OK, I need your help this week pretty please!  There are several among us who are in a place that ALL of us have been.  They are in that terribly uncomfortable place where eating seems to be out of control and fitness is becoming non-existent.  We have all been in that place and most of you have heard me talk about the 30 pounds I gained after my brother died and it took me a year and a half to get my eating what I would call back in line with where I want it.  I would say the same about fitness.  It took a while for my equalibrium to return and now I feel like it has to the degree it can return after the death of a close family member.  I would like to ask each of you who can answer this.
  
   *What steps did you take to reel it in? (That means behaviors)

   *How long did it take you to feel like you were on solid ground again?

   *Do you have a "go to" trick that works every time to steer you back on the path?

This is a way to pick your brains about something that we have all been faced with at one time or another.  Believe it or not, there is a wealth of knowledge inside of each of you that will help your fellow group members more than you know.  Please take some time to think about this and share what it is that motivates you during the storm. 

Have a great week

Friday, February 19, 2010

The End or the Beginning

This Tuesday will be Cathy's last Tuesday with us as Lead Therapist of the H.O.P.E. Program.  I personally have experienced many emotions about her leaving.  I completely understand why she is leaving.  We all must make decisions that are best for us perssonally.  Did you catch that??  We ALL must make decisions that are BEST for us personally.  Now Cathy could have said "Poor Julie, what will she do without me to lead this program, especially in the evening when her eyes are half mast, so I couldn't possibly leave" or "Those sweet little participants just couldn't get throught the week without my wisdom and they might stop their journey of lifestyle change so I couldn't possibly leave" or "The YMCA has never had a program with a therapist working in it, they might get mad if I leave so I couldn't possibly leave".  I guess you get the picture.  While all those things may be true, she did not make a decision based on what she perceived others may need, she made a decision based on what she knew her needs were.  She put herself first, made a decision, and now I will make decisions that are best for me and this program.  It is the end of an era AND it is the beginning of an era.  It really is "both/and"! 

It really is a lesson. To know what is best for me, I have to be in touch with and connected to me.  My encouragement to us all this week, is to connect with ourselves as much as possible.  What are ways that you connect with yourself?  How do you take know what you need?  How do you know who you are?  Be willing to ask questions and to connect with yourself in order to answer them.  It is only when we connect with self that we become aware of who we are, what we feel and what we need.

Have a great week ladies.

**Also, could you all come to group about 10 or 15 minutes early to sign something for Cathy. Thank you!**

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Fox News Rising

For those of you who haven't seen this yet, the H.O.P.E. Program was featured on Fox News Rising yesterday on their morning show.  Here is the link for the show

http://www.foxcharlotte.com/dpp/rising/annas_korner/Fit_Right_Now_An_Inspirational_Story_of_Weight_Loss

Have a great week ladies!

Sunday, February 14, 2010

H.O.P.E. Highlight

I was watching a show on Discovery channel about the terrible incident in 1989 where the Exxon Valdez oil tanker ran aground and spilled over 10 million gallons of unrefined Alaskan crude oil into Prince William Sound, causing the largest oil spill in North American history.  Even now the consequences of that spill can be seen and measured in many ways.  One of the things that grieved my spirit the most about that whole thing was the impact to animal life in a 1200 mile radius.  I bet many of you still remember the pictures of volunteers holding the poor, almost lifeless birds covered, completely covered, in that oil.  The volunteers used Dawn dishwashing liquid to painstakingly wash each feather, each beak, each foot of each bird they worked with.  The birds would have died like so many others did had they not been cleaned of that oil. They could not walk because of the oil, they could not breathe well because of the oil.  They absolutely could not fly, because of the oil.  They could not eat, because of the oil.  Everything they needed to do to live, they simply could not do because of that thick, smelly, slippery, life choking oil!

Does that familiar to anyone??  That is the picture of shame.  Dark, black, smelly, consuming shame.  It covers ever single part of those who have not been cleaned of it.  Everything we need to do in a healthy way as a human-being, we can not do because of shame.  Just like the volunteers had to painstakingly wash every feather clean of that oil, we too need to be painstaking about cleaning the shame out of our lives.  It impacts the journey of lifestyle change more than any other thing I know.  Shame is life choking, just like the oil.  It is dark, just like the oil.  It causes us to slip, just like the oil did to the birds.  There is NOTHING good or healthy about shame.  I also believe that shame is why we yo-yo diet so often.  We can loose all the weight in the world, but if we still have shame deeply rooted in our lives, we will certainly gain it back again.

Here are a few clues that will let you know if you have shame deeply rooted in your life.
     *You say I'm sorry as a common response to just about anything
     *You often punish yourself for perceived wrongdoing
     *Your self talk or internal dialogue is negative and unhealthy most of the time
     *You believe most everything is your fault.
     *You say "I should have ________"(you fill in the blank) most of the time
     *You are sure that others are thinking "bad" things about you

OK, OK, you get the picture.  Now the question becomes how in the world do we begin to break or challenge the shame in our lives.  Great question.  Now, what's the answer??  This is where I am going to pass it on to you guys.  I know that shame is "cleaned" off of us one feather at a time.  What does that mean to you?  How have you actually "cleaned a feather" and challenged shame in your life?  Can you share some ways that you think are helpful in identifying or challenging shame in our life?  How can we walk out of it?  I would also love to hear from some of you on the bigger spiritual answer to the question of shame. 

Have a great rest of the week end and I'll see you next week!

Friday, February 5, 2010

Tiny Tidbits

Well it's another wonderful rainy day with much of the same in the forecast the whole week end. It will be a great time to work on the household things I put off until a rainy day!  I mentioned in group this week that I was going to blog about a topic that a group member brought up and has struggled with recently.  What do we do when we are just sick of the journey of lifestyle change, tired of the day in and day out of eating healthy most of the time, weary of working out 3 days a week and just flat sick of having to "be" on this journey.  The questions then become why do we get in that place, is there any benefit to being in that place and most importantly, what can we do to walk out of that place.  This also ties into the question we have talked about over the last few weeks whether we can become completely free of emotional or compulsive overeating or do we learn to negotiate the journey for life.  I would like to ask for your help this week in answering these questions.  Even if you have no answers, I would like to hear your thoughts about these three questions.

WHY do we get so sick, tired and weary of this journey?

IS THERE any benefit to being in that place?

WHAT can we do to walk out of that place?

Although we touched on a few of these questions in group, I think there is such benefit in pondering them in ernest for clarification's sake.  Understanding how we get there and understanding how we get out is fairly important considering this journey is a lifelong journey. 

Thank you for keeping this conversation going.  You truly are the smartest people I know!!  Stay dry and I'll see you next week.